Small stories of the unexplained
by Shamanic Necro-neko
Summary: Random drabbles from series of shows probaly SK mostly. Lots of car crashes. Apologies for character bashing sometimes. Read and review kudasai! Danke!
1. Marco in the city

Disclaimer: Alright, I see problems where I am going with this. One: I have been studying for a huge exam and my mind is all over the place. And Two: I've been humming consistently for hours now. I do not own SK. And any of you who don't think marco sucks- please don't read- I wouldn't want to offend you –polite smile- and I do not hate lyserg…he just…happens to be with marco a lot…

He walked down the street, passing a small child as the went. The child put his hands in his pockets and continued down the street. Marco looked at his own hands, and sighed to himself- he not only did not have pockets- but his pants were so tight it was almost impossible for him to even dream of sticking his hands in his pockets that he didn't have anyway.

"Marco-kuuun!" Came a small voice from behind him, and the running of feet.

Marco paused and turned, seeing himself in the window he walked up and admired himself. Oh how he loved himself and oh how so beautiful he was. It was distracting how lovely he was.

His eyes…his lovely smile…the way his hair curled around his face and made him look so-

"Maaaarco kuuuuuuuuun!" Lyserg ran up to him and stopped, breathing heavily.

Marco blinked and looked over. "Lyserg."

"I have been-calling—your name—for—ever…" He panted, leaning over on his knees to catch his breath.

"What do you want Lyserg, I was busy, you KNOW when I'm looking into shiny, reflective objects I am busy!"

Lyserg shrank, his pupils became small dots. "Jeanne- sama wishes…"

"Tell Jeanne-sama to go look in a mirror." He said back shortly, brushing a curl of hair from his face and looking in his coat for pockets. Maybe his coat had pockets.

"She needs you at the moment Marco-kun…" Lyserg said, straitening himself back up.

Marco found his pocket and dug his hand in it quickly, fishing out a small Chap Stick tube and looking in the mirror.

"What did I say to tell her Lyserg?" He opened the tube and puckered his lips, spreading the Chap Stick on and smacking his lips together. "Does this colour look good to you?"

Lyserg looked at his lips for a moment then looked gave macro a funny look. "That is besides the point- do you want me to tell Jeanne-sama to look in a mirror- seriously?"

"Yes," He put the Chap Stick away. "In fact I do."

"But…"

"Butts are for chairs Lyserg-kun. You had better look in a mirror too someday, your face is…" he grabbed Lyserg's face and mashed it around in his hand. "A little off or something like that."

"My face is fine Marco-kun." He stepped back quickly and rubbed his face. "You should be careful…"

"GO TELL JEANNE MY ANSWER!"

Lyserg took off really fast down the street to go find Iron Maiden Jeanne. In a split moment Marco decided he was going to go get some ice cream across the street. He pushed the button, the light signaled to cross and he went across the street. The car next to him was so shiny, he just had to stop and admire himself in the shine.

"Get out of the way Sir." The person inside said. Marco moved to the side mirror and admired himself more- because he was feeling vain and lovely.

"Because," He reminded his reflection. "I am pretty and lovely."

There was a honk and a car made a sharp turn, there was just enough time for Marco to see his lovely reflection in the windshield of the car before he forgot everything.

And that is the end of Marco, the man with insanely short/tight shorts, and a stupid mind.

The end.


	2. Chocolove in NY

Disclaimer: Chocolove bashing- I don't own SK, and frankly, I don't ever want to own chocolove. Slightly graphic…. because of my … 'love' of the character.

Chocolove patted his big, fluffy fro. It was pretty in New York. There was so much to see and so many places to go. And normally it was pretty crowded in the streets, so most of the time he and his spirit Mick walked the streets searching for things and people to annoy.

"Look, see that chick over there." He looked at his spirit and then pointed to a rather older lady. "She needs my help crossing the street.

The old woman looked at him suspicious- men in skirts like that were not to be trusted. Kilts were one thing, that skirt was another thing. A WHOLE other thing.

"Can I help ya across the street lady?"

"Get away from me!" She hollered, grabbing her purse and beating him with it. "You crazy, cross dressing leopard boy!" She whacked him hard.

"GAH!—GAH!#!" He yelled, backing away from the lady. "Crazy woman!"

"That man tried to mug me!" The old woman said, pointing a hand at Chocolove.

A cop looked over from his cop car. "What is it ma'am?"

"That man," She pointed. "He was trying to push me into the street."

"Honest officer I wasn't!" Chocolove said, backing into the road away from the car.

"Sir…" The cop said.

"I didn't do anything officer…you see…it was a joke…a … a what to do with an old lady in the street joke."

"Sir…" The cop again insisted.

"And…you um…throw them in the street..GAHHAHAHAHAH! Get it! THE STREET!"

"SIR IM GONNA HAVE TO ASK YOU TO LOOK AROUND YOURSELF!" the cop yelled just as a large taxi crashed into Chocolove and rolled him under the car. (Under, not my favorite version of over) There was a sound like a car stalling and it tried to go forward quickly to get over the speed bump it had run down. Chocolove was under the car, looking at the little pipes that went all around it frantically.

"GET ME OUT OF HERE THIS ISNT FUNNY!" he yelled angrily, trying to squirm but only getting under the wheels and getting squished.

The car drove forwards, but had to turn back to make a three point turn- because you see, the road was too narrow. And so he ran over chocolove a couple more times, spreading his not so chocolatey goodness all over the roads.

And THAT my dear friends, was the end of chocolove the not so chocolately, not funny, guy.


	3. Faust, Cars, Scissors

This is for you MilkChanchan- If any of you are offended….um…sorry? Its not supposed to appease ALLL of this world. This story was actually in 'My Fist' but I had to move it here! I don't own SK and I don't own Edward Scissorhands- I think this needed to be relocated though.

Akio walked down the cobbled roadways of Germany to the old lab. Inside she could hear yells of angry words coming from inside the locked bathroom. "Meine Hände sind nicht Schere!" She could hear someone screaming (my hands are not scissors – german)

"Hello?"

The door shot open and a man with frazzled blonde hair hanging into his bloodstained face looked out. "Akio?"

She paused, confused. "Yes…."

"My hands…" He held out his hands, which were knifelike and somehow disturbing to her.

She paled slightly, used to blood but not the human contraption before her. "I…see…"

He laughed then fumbled around on himself, obviously looking for something with his spindly, metal fingers. "Can not find it-!"

"Find what?"

He let out a small, girlish chuckle and produced a syringe from his coat, threading a blade through the end and injecting himself. The giggling chuckle continued as he bolted down the stairs.

Akio walked to the window and looked out as a car drove by, honking wildly and trying to swerve in the narrow roads.

"I-AM-SCISSOR—"

"GET OUT OF THE ROAD!" The driver yelled, fuming.

"HAHAHAHAHAH!"

There was a smack and the sound of exhaust leaking through the car as Faust was propelled up the hood of the car and back over the end of it. Akio watched and the driver said some more than unfavorable things in German before speeding away. Walking outside she saw the man lying face down on the road.

Frankensteiny, very much scratched somehow all over, ran over to his master and nudged his head- rolling it nowhere as it looked intently at the ground.

"I wanted to be a master…an artist…" He moaned half happy- half delusional into the ground.

"Was?" Akio asked, looking down at him.

"My hands….haaands…." He lay his head sideways to look UP at her, something he normally never did. "Bushes…..Bushes akio….that is….the secret….to…" he let out a small gasp and put his face back down on the road.

Frankensteiny barked and akio studied the marks on him, finding they were scissor marks- in an attempt to cut the dogs hair that it did not have.

Faust passed out on the ground, probably overdosed, probably because he had been hit by a car and propelled through the air into the ground. No one was really sure which one it was. But the necromancer who wanted to be a bush/hair master somehow died.

The end.


	4. The Return

I feel like I'm in a marcoish mood, but I dunno what brought it on…hm… I don't own SK so that's the disclaimer GAHAHA I just had to write this! Gosh, he just had to come back!

If it was possible, the necromancer had brought his first body back from death- reversed death as it had seemed. And as the blonde hair fell away from the chisel cheekbones and he gazed at his fine workmanship the man smiled, burst into insane laughter, started to cry, and then injected himself with morphine before slinking away into the confines of the dirty lab/house.

The long lashed eyes blinked open to look at the ceiling. Hands went to the smooth, cold face and touched it in shock. "I'm…alive?"

"WhAt?" Faust yelled, laughing and crying from somewhere in the lab.

"Someone get my a mirror!" Marco screamed, sitting up and looking around. "Where am I? Where is Iron Jeanne? Lyserg-chan where are you!" he looked around, his happiness of being alive left in the dust.

"Excuse me Mr. But don't I deserve at least a thank you?" Faust came strutting back into the room and looked at him. "A 'Wow Faust, what a marvelously brilliant necromancer you are I'm so happy to be alive.'" Faust beamed.

Marco studied him for a moment.

Faust looked at him and his morphinated face slipped into malevolent anger. "Who the crap are you and what are you doing in my house."

Marco was shocked and his hands flew to his open mouth in a gasp. "Oh."

"Don't 'oh' me you stranger!" He threw his long, muscular arm out. "Frankensteiny, get me my scythe!"

Marco jumped on the table, nearly splitting his tighly pulled on black shorts. "Back!"

"Don't tell me to get back you infernal crossdresser!" Faust swung his scythe and Marco shrieked.

"Iron Jeanne is gonna have your head for this! Ahhh! No one assaults an X-law!"

"FAUST!" Manta yelled, running in the room.

Faust's head twisted inhumanly to the side to look down at manta then he smiled and laughed. "Oh Manta you little guy you- that are you doing in my laboratory? I thought you were afraid of me?"

"Um…" Manta said, seeing Marco's wide eyes look at the scythe which was just inches from his waist. "Faust I'm gonna have to ask you to step away from the man in black pants."

Faust was confused. " What are you talking about little manta?"

"LYSERG WHRE ARE YOU?" Marco screamed. "BRING ME A MIRROR! YOU CANT KILL ME FAUST I'M TOO BEAUTIFUL!"

Faust dropped the scythe and it crashed to the floor. "I can't kill anything beautiful!" His eyes widened. "I'm sorry, Sir…erm..Ma'am?"

"I'm a man!" Marco screamed. "I'm just so beautiful all the women admire me, they're so jealous!"

Faust smiled and nodded with his eyes shut before they opened again wide. "MANTA WHERE IS MY ELIZA!"

"Eliza?" Manta and Marco both said.

"ELIZA!" Faust screamed, injecting himself with morphine as he ran away.

"Faust I told you not to run with needles!" Manta yelled, chasing him.

Marco took this moment to hop gracefully off the table, his blonde hair falling in silky sheets around his face, and go outside.

"KILL DR. FRANKENSTIEN!" A group of angry German peasants yelled as Marco got outside. "WE CANNOT LET HIM BRING FORTH SUCH EVIL! LOOK WHAT HE HAS CREATED IN THAT LAB!"

Marco posed and batted his eyelashes. "I'm lovely aren't I, I can't believe you all love me so much!"

"KILL HIM!"

Marco's school-girl smile dropped. "Oh dear, they're not happy…"

"KILL HIM!" they screamed again as they advanced nearer to him.

"IRON JEANNE WHERE ARE YOU!" Marco screamed.

At once a large metal coffin full of vines and Iron Jeanne- Lyserg riding on the top came flying through the air and landed, SPLAT, on top of Marco.

"Do not fear my children," Iron Jeanne said, coming out of the coffin thing. "I have come to instruct you in the ways of love and joy, and peace."

"Love and peace!" Lyserg said happily, hopping off the big metal Iron-Jeanne case.

Marco's hand twitched from under the coffin thing as Iron Jeanne was sucked back into it because the villagers were not exactly happy to hear about love and peace. They wanted to kill Dr. Frankenstein, which they had mistaken Faust for. And as Iron Jeanne and Lyserg flew and Faust ran away with Manta, Eliza and Frankenstieny- Marco was left pummeled into the pretty green grass outside- never to be seen again.


End file.
